Meet Christina!

I am so happy to introduce you all to Christina! Here is her inspiring story to share.

1. Cradle Catholic, Convert or Revert? 

I'm a cradle Catholic, but grew up in an unconventional Catholic family: my parents were both part of the charismatic movement before they married, so I got a lot more Scripture, praise and worship, and extemporaneous prayer than most people who are raised Catholic. I knew from a young age that Jesus was a real Person who loved me and wanted to be in relationship with me--the devotional aspects of the faith (especially to the Saints and Mary) didn't really become part of my practice of the faith till I was in college. 

2. You're very open about having got married 'late' in life, tell us a little bit about how you met your husband and the circumstances surrounding that. 

I fully expected to meet my husband in college and get married at 22. Thanks be to God (because I was *so* not ready), he allowed me to remain single until 33, which gave both myself and my husband Kristian (unbeknownst to me at the time) lots of time to work through our issues and prepare ourselves for marriage. We met through my mom (you can read the whole story on my blog (theevangelista.com)--it's a good one) and dated for about five months before we got engaged, and then were married about five months after that. It was quick, but since we were older and had done a lot of personal work in therapy and spiritual direction, that pace was perfect and didn't feel rushed at all. 

3. As a segue to that, what words of advice and encouragement do you have for other women who find themselves in that state in life (i.e. a little older, wanting to get married and haven't found 'the one")

Be honest with the Lord in prayer. Find a good therapist if you need one (and you probably need one). Get into spiritual direction. Enjoy all of the things that are unique about being single: time for prayer, going to Mass and being able to focus, sleeping as much as you want, leisurely meals, having total control over your schedule, etc. 

4. Finding yourself "in the motherhood" now, how do you balance being newly married, a mother and prayer life?

I wouldn't say I "balance" anything, really. I'm not sure if that's possible. My hope is that the unifying principle of my life is Christ, but that doesn't mean that I get to spend long periods of time in silent prayer each day (ha!). As a married woman and mother, the primary way I love Christ is by being faithful to my vocation, but that looks different each day and in each season. Some days, like recently when Joseph had croup, caring for my son takes all of my time and energy  and I can only pray in snatches. When both my husband and me are sleep-deprived, which happens often with a little one in the house, we do what we can to stay connected throughout the day, but we don't necessarily go on full-fledged dates regularly. He works from home, so it's a bit easier to connect throughout the day than it would be otherwise. I do have daily non-negotiables that I try to do no matter what: prayer, silence (no podcasts or music in the background), playing with Joseph, movement (whether it's a workout or just a walk around the neighborhood), and reading (aloud to Joseph, and doing my own reading during naptime or before bed). Otherwise, I keep our home life very simple, which I think is the key to peace.

5. What skill do you struggle with the most?

Cleaning. I love making my home beautiful in terms of decor and plant life and I enjoy tidying up, but actually cleaning is really tough for me. Thankfully, I have a husband who cares more about cleanliness than I do, and understands that I don't have time during the day (usually) to deep clean. A lot of times, he's the one who does most of the cleaning! #blessed

6. What are some things you avoid, as a family or otherwise? 

Over-scheduling ourselves. Kristian is an extrovert and would be happy to do something social daily, but Joseph and I both need more quiet and consistent routine. I need it because I'm more on the introverted side and struggle with anxiety, and Joseph needs it because he's a toddler. We don't usually go out on weeknights, and on weekends we try to pick one activity to do as a family. I recently stepped away from some freelance writing work and put a few ministry-type ideas on hold because although those things were good, they would have made our lives more complicated and stressful. There will be a season for outside apostolates, but now is not that season. 

7. What book(s) are you currently reading? The Montessori Toddler by Simone Davies, Anne of Avonlea by L.M. Montgomery (I'm re-reading it for the umpteenth time), Co-Workers of the Truth by Joseph Ratzinger (my favorite theologian of all time), and every picture book about trucks/cars/vehicles that our library has to offer. 

8. Who have been your go-to saints through the years? St. Edith Stein, because of her intellectual prowess and writings on women; St. Gianna Molla because she got married later in life and was such a heroic mother; Sts. Perpetua and Felicity because they were the first women martyrs in the Church, and we have firsthand accounts of their martyrdoms that are powerful; Our Lady, Undoer of Knots, because her novena has been one of the most powerful I've prayed. 

9. What's your favorite product, baby or otherwise? 85% dark chocolate. Always. 

10. If you wrote a book, what would the title be? While You Wait: A Guide to Seeking Holiness and Wholeness During Your Single Years 

BONUS QUESTION! With Mother's Day around the corner, tell us how you would like to celebrate this day? In other words, what would be your ideal day? My ideal day would include 1) sleeping in, 2) Mass with my husband and son, 3) time to pray by myself after Mass, 4) flowers, 5) not having to cook, 6) a delicious dinner made by my husband with Joseph's "help." :) 

THANK YOU CHRISTINA for sharing your story and your encouraging words! May God continue to bless you and your family abundantly!

Meet Shannon!

I'm Shannon Evans and my husband Eric and I have been married for 12 years and are currently "baking" our fifth child. (The first came through adoption and the rest have grown in my belly.) I'm a writer and speaker and am eagerly awaiting the release of my first book this summer—Embracing Weakness: The Unlikely Secret to Changing the World.

1. Cradle Catholic, Convert or Revert? 

I joined the Catholic Church at 30 years old with my husband after a lifetime of devout Protestantism—in fact, we were evangelical missionaries in Southeast Asia just a few years before becoming Catholic!

2. What is the best way you find balance in your life (what are your ‘non-negotiables’ and how do you mange stress)?

I need lots of time for contemplation. Often, for me, this looks like writing time, because that's often how I process my world. As an introverted mama, I have learned through the years that I can get by without a lot of things, but quiet time alone is not one of them!

3. What is a skill you struggle with?

Cleaning the house—and yes, I consider that a skill! Probably because I don't have it.

4. What are some things you avoid personally, as a family or otherwise)?

We avoid over committing our time. Our family culture is one that really values a slow, simple life that is invested in our immediate neighborhood and gives our kids time to explore, play, get bored, and deal with boredom. 

5. You write on your blog (shannonkevans.com) that at the heart of our humanity is the need for community and authenticity. (I agree!) How would you encourage others to cultivate these authentic communities?

It's hard because it takes vulnerability, which can be uncomfortable. We tend to want to present our best selves to the outside world, but that pressure keeps us from feeling fully known by others—and convinces them that they can't be fully known by us, in all their imperfections. Being open about your struggles and wounds feels risky, but taking that risk is the only real way to forge meaningful connection in community.

6. Tell us a little bit about your book Embracing Weakness; what’s at the heart of it and what prompted you to write it?

It's about re-centering our beliefs to be more in line with the message of Jesus through his incarnation and passion: that it is in our human weakness and sufferings that we can truly encounter God and one another, free of the pressures and bravado that come with trying to prove our strength and merit. I wrote it because I've always been the kind of person who wants to change the world—and I used to think that would come through my success and effectiveness. Through missions and motherhood, I had to embrace the truth that any positive impact I might have on the world will only come from accepting my own small and broken places. 

7. What book/s are you currently reading? And/or podcast/s you listen to?

I'm reading The Ignatian Adventure this year to guide my prayer life, which has been really fruitful. I recently finished the novel Where the Crawdads sing, and am slowly making my way through the book Untie The Strong Woman, about our Blessed Mother. 

8. Favorite children’s read aloud?

It's an unsung hero, but I really loved reading Because of Winn-Dixie to my oldest. I thought it did a gentle but compelling job of addressing heavy issues for a child.

9. Best parenting tip?

When your child is acting their worst, they need your compassion the most. Connection is always more effective than punishment.

10. Who inspires you?

Women who refuse to be put in a box or accept a glass ceiling!

THANK YOU SHANNON!!

Meet Lauren!

Lauren Sheard with hubby and kids, @farmsteadmeatsmith

I'm very glad to join this communion of fine ladies.  I'm a west coast girl: born in Phoenix, AZ; grew up all over Northern CA and Reno, NV; schooled in Southern CA and now live in a small island in the Puget Sound: Vashon Island, Washington State to be exact. I love the spaciousness of this part of the world and cherish the quiet and rootedness of living in the midst of a Douglas fir forest on a 2.5 acre plot my husband and I homestead with our 6 kids.  Brandon and I married almost 11 years ago.  We met on a blind date (sailing camping trip to Catalina Island) when we were finishing up grad school, I at Point Loma Nazarene University in San Diego.  

We homeschool, work out of the home, homebirth (when the babies allow--our last was in an ambulance!), and grow most of our protein at home as well.  Our home is very much my scourging pillar; in a beautiful, domestic-church sort of way.  I focus the homeschool on a classic/CharlotteMason/read-aloud/"Morning-time" model (though the boys do require some military discipline at times) and my MA in Theology (plus my protestant background) allows me to focus on catechism, scripture and theology with them.  I'm most proud of the fact that the kids already know about typology and paradox while not yet able to read a calendar or tie their shoes.  My eldest, at 10 years, still daily asks what day it is today. 

Together, Brandon and I started Farmstead Meatsmith in 2010, but while my over-(read: obsessive)conscientiousness helped start our email list, keep a job schedule and plan class events, I've had to slowly loosen my iron grip and allow (read: trust) my husband to truly take over this past year with the arrival of our 6th baby and homeschool on the rise.  It's been a big maturation/conversion for me, but like all things the natural law teaches, it's sufferings have yielded rewards most bountiful.  To keep my cool, I walk a little most days, look forward to reading every night before sleep (about 2-3 pages in several books at once), drink hot lemon water to sooth me when all the kids are in bed while I keep up with current Church events with Brandon, and make sure to put enough maple syrup in my coffee on Sunday afternoons.  

1. Are you a cradle catholic, convert or revert? 

 I converted from being what I call an Evangelical Mutt.  My childhood church was a mega-evangelical-type-but-officially-Assemblies-of-God congregation, (a very sincere and strengthening experience), my dad is Calvinist in theology, my college and grad school experience was mostly Wesleyan with a stint of Oxford Anglicanism during a semester away in England.  I ended up Catholic for lots of reasons, but think much of it was due to my father fostering in me the ability to ask questions, and encouragement to never stop asking them until I got a satisfactory answer.  Theology of the Body is what immediately brought Brandon and I 'in on it' together as we already intuitively wanted contraceptive-free intimacy once we got married.  We always say that adherence to natural-law alone will bring you to this approach if one is philosophically honest (for health, environmental, ethical reasons alone, much less combined) so when we learned that a church actually teaches that approach from a spiritual perspective, we were very quickly sold.... you throw true teaching about Mary, tradition and the sacraments into the mix and it was a sealed deal very quickly.  Oh yes, a master's thesis on the Eucharist (as a protestant) also guided me intellectually into the right arena with St. Thomas Aquinas as my guide.

2. Between homesteading, working alongside your husband and raising 5 kids, what helps you the most to balance all these plates? 

Morning Offering; Rosary (or most of one) every afternoon while laying the girls down and the house gets a little (only a little) quiet; a Benedictine charism of rootedness, rhythm & hospitality (I'm extremely extroverted (and you can forget traveling with this large young clan!) so we often have people come to us); learning to say 'no' so that I can more happily say 'yes' to the essentials; Ignatian Examine and quiet prayer nightly.

3 . Listening to your podcasts @farmsteadmeatsmith, one quickly learns that the 'end' of  your abattoir and educational operation is to cook and eat well.  Do you enjoy cooking?  If so, maybe go into the details surrounding that, such as: what do you cook? How did you hone your cooking skills? Growing up, who was your inspiration for cooking?

Oddly enough, I've enjoyed it more as I've let more go of the business side of things.  Often I struggle with the "plumber-not-plumbing-his-own-home" syndrome, (or is it the "cobbler's-children-needing-shoes" syndrome?).  But I have learned really from Brandon who is the inspired chef of the family.  I didn't grow up learning the domestic arts, so I've had to learn some basic principles: Is it bland? Make sure it's got enough fat and salt.  Is it too salty? Add some vinegar.  After browning meat, always de-glaze with some wine and add stock for a reduction...this makes any meal spectacular., etc.  So it still comes in fits and spurts (I resort to easy lunches for the kids like anyone), and I definitely look to Jane Grigson & Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall for inspiration. 

I've honed my cooking skills the same way you hone any skill (including art, prayer, communication, etc.) simply by doing a thing over and over again, making lots of mistakes and after each attempt getting back on the horse for a slightly better try next time.  I say begin with the conviction that to be a good cook is a good in itself.  That will give you the motivation to keep at it and learn the disciplines or principles necessary.  Right now, I'm teaching myself to draw after a lifetime of being told (by others and myself) that I couldn't/shouldn't be artistic.  I'm starting with the belief that it is a good thing to know how to 'see' a thing and I want to give this desire to my children by modeling it.  I have been able to attach some recently acquired theological principles of life to this pursuit--if a thing is True, it's True across all disciplines--and I must say I'm just off to the races, surprisingly!  (For interest's sake, these principles are 1) that it's the light that gives a thing definition, and 2) Therese's Little Way: the smallest strokes often make the biggest difference.  I would say these may be able to be applied to cooking too, though I've not thought about it before...) Anyway, all one needs is to desire to learn.  Drawing is my new weekly therapy....every Saturday morning after the house is cleaned, we all get our pads of paper out and draw something.  Cooking can be similar.  Don't try to make 3 magnificent meals a day.  Maybe just focus on making Sunday dinner a little nicer than normal.  Then add something to Saturday night or morning, etc.  Above all, let it be a gift to your family (don't do it out of obligation or media pressure or it will never last), and you'll find it raises everyone's spirits and gives inspiration to your husband, kids, etc. in unexpected ways.  

Oh yes, one more quick encouragement here.  I know it's hard.  I. Know. It's. Hard....but try to incorporate your kids in the kitchen.  I even allow them to hold knives.  I know.  My mom wants to kill me.  But I do. And they even cut themselves.  But, with my supervision, I think we need to allow them little tasks,  or they will never feel welcomed in the kitchen and the desire to participate in food (the way our Savior communicates himself to us!) is a chapter in their lives that will almost certainly close (at least without much heavy lifting later).  Do bite your lip that extra bit and allow the kids some kitchen prep space; just once in a while.  The rewards you will reap here cannot be overemphasized: natural conversation fodder with your kids (right? like who wants to talk about hard things while staring right at each other....give the little hands something to work with), skill-building, self-esteem growth, memory making, hearth-strengthening, food-testing! and so much more.

I guess one last note here: Yes, we do go meatless on most Fridays.  Having a business around feasting with meat has informed us so much on the material, formal and efficient causes of our food—and our personhood in God—but only fasting from it occasionally can teach us our final cause.

4. If you could invite any three people to dinner, who would you invite? 

Brandon's Grandparents (never met them, and I think we are a lot like them).  I'd make them my steak and kidney pie.  Also, St. Joan of Arc.  I'd make something very peasant Frenchy for her: duck confit. 

5  It seems you are very competent in many things, is there a skill with which you struggle? 

Hand-writing.  It's starting to really show as I teach my kids.  Also, interior design.  Having your own business means you pour every extra cent into it, and having a farm business means it often goes to the outdoors or to media needs.  Our house is starting to have one-too many dry wall holes for me to stomach anymore, so I'm getting the bug to paint or re-envision, but I could use some pointers...Any inspiration sources from your audience?

6. What are some things you avoid (personally or as a family)?

 Candy.  I think it's been a good move.  Also, we only do movies once a week.  It was hard, but I made the decision to forego daily TV time and it drastically improved everyone's mood.  It's still hard and definitely a constant siren song, but I'm happy with the results. No microwave, no fast food. Brandon says we generally avoid fun. I do try a little in this area.

7.What book(s) are you currently reading? 

Just finished Fulton Sheen's "7 Words of Jesus and Mary; Lessons from Cana to Calvary".  Fr. Timothy Gallagher's "The Discernment of Spirits".  Fr. Jacques Philippe's "8 Doors of the Kingdom: Meditations on the Beatitudes."  Cline and Fay's, "Parenting with Love and Logic" & Brant Pitre's "Jesus and the Jewish Roots of Mary".  Highly recommend them all.

8. What is the best advice (parenting or otherwise) you've received?  

 Don't joke about your husband to other people...even in front of him...even in sarcasm. It's never attractive. 

9. Who inspires you?  

Mother Mary and Jesus.  I know that's pretty old-hat, but they are my go-tos.  The Wedding at Cana is my all-time favorite mystery.  It's got it all, and I often return there in my heart.  To that end, my sons (10, 8 and 6) are starting to really impress me at times as well.

THANK YOU LAUREN! 

Here and Back Again

So...the adventure of life continues here in the Meloche household or as Richard likes to call it: our homestead. We have moved (more about that later), Richard is heading up a new theological institute (ditto) and, seven months ago, we had a beautiful baby girl : Zelie-Marie Bernadette. Heeeeere she is...

These are a couple of shots from Zelie-Marie's Baptism. I'll be posting more about that soon (and by soon I mean probably within the next 6 months).

Here are a couple more recent ones:

The sad truth is I don't have a lot of pics of this cutie; it just goes with the territory of being the youngest of six.  But she's so forgiving I'll doubt she'll hold it against me.  This girl has got the best attitude: laid back and easy going...nothing like her mama. 

Next up we have Richard and the boys putting up fencing to prep for the Dexter cow and pigs he wants to get.  I told him I wanted a miniature donkey. I don't know why I want one - I just think they're cute looking; and you know what they say: Donkeys are a girl's best friend... or something like that.

Handsome cowboys.

Last week we drove to Mt. Magazine State Park in Arkansas and did a little hiking.  We also stayed at the nearby Subiaco Monastery (in the retreat house- not with the monks) which was lovely and oh so peaceful.

Miserable Isidore. Put those together and you get Miseradore.

Happy Isidore

Sweet Mila

Me and my crew...and Simon my bodyguard.

St. Benedict is the best.

Zelie-Marie's first selfie.

In other news, Ezra recently learned how to hot wire our lawn mower.

Recently, Mila, Ezra and Simon received the sacrament of Confirmation.  Simon, also received his first Holy Communion. Here's proof:

Then came 4th of July when the most daring of our children, Isidore, bravely held a sparkler in his very flammable pajamas all while keeping his eyes wide open.

Here's Augustin literally turning five right in front of the camera.

A Foxy Cake for a Sly Guy.